Gerald Hiestrand and Jay Thomas
Crossway, 2012, 149 pp., $12.99
I really don’t know if I should feel sorry for Josh Harris. There is a saying that goes: “There is no such thing as bad publicity”…it seems every book written on the topic of dating, sexuality, love, romance and current cultural norms regarding adolescence references Harris’ book I Kissed Dating Goodbye. It is used as the standard measuring stick for all other things “single,” and then proceeds to make a case for why he didn’t go far enough or didn’t get it quite right and why the author’s current work is getting closer to the truth. In Sex, Dating and Relationships: A Fresh Appoach the authors make their case that Harris was close, but they are closer still.
The good news regarding this book is that Hiestrand and Thomas are biblical scholars who have written a book saturated with biblical narrative. They contribute to the Society for the Advancement of Ecclesial Theology. The organization’s website states, “theology and the pastorate belong together, and pastors must once again function as writing theologians for the wider church, for the ecclesial renewal of theology and theological renewal of the church.”
Therein lies my difficulty with the book being a viable tool for you as a youth leader. I was confused about the book’s intended audience. It is one of the most thoroughly apologetic books I have read on the topic of dating and sexuality, yet fear that those who are in the dating demographic are not going to be attracted to an exegetical approach for their romantic endeavors. At the outset, the authors disclose their intent: “As we hope to show, sex, dating, and relationships find their ultimate meaning in the relationship between Jesus and his people; the former testify to the latter. In other words, sex and relationships are all about the gospel. To miss this central truth, we believe, is not only to miss the whole point of romance and sexuality but also to confuse God’s clear boundaries regarding sexual activity between unmarried men and women” (p. 13).
Hiestrand and Thomas stay true to their goal. They address difficult subjects, acknowledging which topics are addressed directly in Scripture and the topics where Scripture is silent. The authors’ have included a thorough plan for dating couples with timelines leading toward the ultimate goal: marriage.
