As I have looked back through the years, the definition of success has been a little clouded in regard to youth ministry. I remember reading Your First Two Years in Youth Ministry by Doug Fields and wishing this book had been available when I first started in ministry. I feel this is a resource that is vital for youth pastors to have despite the size of one’s ministry.

After reading Fields’ book, I asked myself the question he raised: “If the ministry is considered successful in three months, what will that look like? In six months? In one year?” The term success has been a dark cloud hanging over ministry for years. Everyone has a different definition for success. The youth pastor search committee, candidate, senior pastor, parents and students all have separate criteria.

We live in a world where success is gauged by the number of people in our programs and the size of our budgets. God provided plenty of examples in Scripture where He did much with little of either. As pastors, we need to take a step back and refocus. Many of us have lost sight of the most important aspects of ministry. We need to realize the focus is not our students as much as the God who called us to serve them.

As do many others, I have to keep track of attendance of various events. I do this to help me adjust my budget from year to year, as well as to make sure I have enough volunteer leaders. It is hard when attendance drops or when you get a call from a student requesting to be removed from the mailing list for newsletters and updates.

It is easy to forget that we still have 12 students in discipleship or that two prayed to receive Christ during the past week. We tend to forget that following See You at the Pole (SYATP), the students were so excited that they started a campus Bible study and meet at the pole for prayer weekly! Success is far more than numbers; it is based on obedience to our God-given vision.

It gets easy to compare ourselves to other people in ministry. Oswald Chambers said it well: “You have to walk in the light of the vision that has been given to you and not compare yourself with others or judge them; it is between them and God.” Youth pastors share a calling from God to minister to and with youth. The vision for each person’s ministry is going to be different. It is going to require different methods, budgets and people with various gifts. The result still should still be the same: making disciples.

So here are a few things to keep in mind in determining a successful youth ministry. You will find these are biblical and God-honoring. No matter the church or calling, if these are in check, you will have a successful ministry.

1) Healthy Family (1 Timothy 3:2-7; Galatians 5:25)—You have to make investments in your family. Your spouse needs to know you don’t have a mistress or suitor on the side named, Ministry. Your children have to know you love them more than you love the church.

There are several ways you can achieve this. For starters, take some time each day for you and your spouse to discuss the day. Give him or her undivided attention and truly listen. Your children need to see your spouse is your first priority.

Then take a few moments with each of your children to catch up on their day. Provide the same individual attention to them that you try so hard to give each of your students.

Schedule some uninterrupted time for family. We make every Sunday afternoon a family day that is not to be interrupted. However, if an emergency arises I can respond because my family investments outweigh my family withdrawals.

When you are away on a youth ministry event, take a day or two off when you return to invest in your family. Take them out for a day with dad! Take your spouse out for a date night or an afternoon.

In a period of broken homes, we have to give a biblical example to our students of how a healthy relationship functions and what proper priorities are. We are to represent who God is to our families. We want to draw people to Him, not push them away. Remember, “the light that shines the furthest shines the brightest at home.”

2) Environment (Acts 17)—As youth pastors, we have to become students of the culture. You do not have to become a slave, but immerse yourself in order to reach this generation effectively. What movies, music, TV shows, books and magazines do your students find interesting? Explore them and gain your own perspective as opposed to relying on reviews that are clouded by someone else’s worldview.

This is in keeping with Paul’s method of ministry. He saw and heard things that distressed him, but he became a student of the culture in order to earn the right to be heard. He witnessed things that served as an opening to share the gospel, and it yielded great results. Consider taking a notebook and sit in the mall food court for an hour. You will be surprised at the amount of information you will gather.

3) Relationships (Colossians 1:3-6)—This can be combined with certain points from number two. You can ask any student about the youth group memories he or she has, and very rarely will a sermon be recalled as one of the high points. Most responses are going to consist of personal letters, lunches, games and times they spent with you personally.

Teens struggle with boundaries when it comes to relationships because intimate relationships are a deeply rooted desire. They want youth pastors who will be honest and someone they can respect. We have to be ready to put down the Bible study book and talk about what is on their hearts. Look at the woman at the well—Jesus met an emotional need and it opened the door for the spiritual need. Look at the result when we follow His example. She became His main advocate in her village.

4) Leadership (Proverbs 15:22)—As youth pastors, we often get burned out because we fail to develop leaders and delegate tasks. Ministry relationships extend beyond the students and into your leaders. You need to see that you are not the only one able to be an effective influence in the students’ lives. You should see this as an honor rather than a threat when you see leaders being effective extensions of you in the lives of students.

Leaders also serve as a creative team. They can give you ideas for things they pick up in small groups that could determine your next series. Their gifts combined with yours can make for a very fulfilled team. We constantly have to remind ourselves that it is not about us! Paul cultivated leaders and moved on. He could do so with peace in his heart because of the time he spent developing leaders.

Having monthly team meetings. Send out a template each week to serve as your leader update. This can remind them of prayer requests and meetings. There are websites that offer podcasts on youth leadership that you can send to your leaders and then discuss at the next meeting.

Dropping a letter to your leaders will encourage them and help energize them to push ahead. Take the time to ask your leaders what their gifts are and where they see themselves serving. This will help in their effectiveness and possibly open your eyes to a need that you never saw before. God works in mysterious ways!

This all may be things you already know or it can serve as a reminder. Whatever effect, know that success is not defined by numbers or finances, but rather lives being changed as a result of obedience to the call God placed on your heart. Don’t get caught up in a program and forsake your ministry. Sometimes the line between the two can get blurred.

Setting these parameters will help you to learn to say no to good things and say yes to better things. It also will help your first ministry grow: your family! If you fail at home, nothing else matters. If you are being obedient to your calling and keeping a check on these things, you are serving a successful ministry!

Christopher has started several outreach ministries and serves as Pastor of Students at Cornerstone Community Church. Chris resides with his wife and son in Spokane, Washington.