All confessing aside, the most significant person in my life besides my wife, parents and grandparents is probably Dan Glaze, a volunteer youth worker from my high school days. Even though I'm officially all grown up, I still unofficially talk with Dan about all kinds of life stuff. Whether I'm stumbling through a valley or dancing on a mountaintop, the pattern I developed in high school of hashing things out with my trusted friend and mentor remains a natural reflex. He hears it all—the good, the bad and the ugly. Just like in high school, Dan helps me wrestle through it all. He's the kind of youth worker we all dream about being. He encourages and loves me, but also challenges me with in-your-face words.

What's more, Dan says his best youth ministry days are with guys and girls like me—former students now in their mid-30s. He's been the best man in weddings. He and his wife have done premarital counseling. They've helped dozen of former students work through major financial and family decisions. To Dan, these days out-best his former best days.

I, too, am experiencing this new kind of best day, and what follows are a few personal stories. In no way do I share these stories to convince anyone that I'm now an expert on ministry to former students. Take these stories for what they're meant to be—simple, learn-as-I-go tales upon which to reflect—and view the dos and don'ts at the end of this article as personal journal entries I'm still writing as I travel through this new, evolving journey.

The Best Days Experienced

While I view the former students I'm connecting with as peers (they're in their late 20s), they still see me as their youth pastor and mentor. In other words, many see me the same way I view Dan Glaze. He is and always will be my youth pastor.

For instance, one former student I'll call Blake meets me at Starbucks pretty regularly. We talk about anything and everything on his mind: theology, potential careers, potential dates. Our conversations, while usually casual, quickly become in-depth when Blake is facing something significant. What has intrigued me most has been Blake's openness. Even though he's the quiet, confident type, he now shares freely about family difficulties and his own personal insecurities. Blake was tight-lipped about personal stuff back in high school, but now, everything just comes out without any probing. It's taken years (12 to be exact) for him to be this open with me, and this new openness has created ministry opportunities I never dreamed were attainable back when Blake was in high school.

Another student I've reconnected with is Travis. Travis was my first "trophy" student, because his walk with God was so stellar. Today, Travis is engaged to a non-believer. He asked me to do the ceremony. My personal conviction is that I'll do premarital counseling with any couple, but that doesn't mean I'll perform every marriage ceremony. While I'll perform ceremonies for two followers of Christ or two non-believers, I won't perform a ceremony for a Christian and non-Christian. For me, the "unequally yoked" passage (2 Cor. 6:14), while not talking directly about marriage, promotes the idea that Christians who are focused on the quest for holiness can't truly be one with unbelievers.