Christina: I’m into girls and guys being together for worship and group activities, then separating for small groups where they can discuss the deeper stuff. Girls will be more comfortable chatting with girls, and guys tend to share more with other guys. It’s also important to create times when girls and guys share together.

Crystal: Absolutely! First, there are some topics that are best discussed alone. Second, because interests and learning styles are different, activities can be catered to each sex. Third, we all know how much sexual tension and attraction there is during junior and senior high for some kids. Removing that distraction can make ministry easier.

YWJ: What advice do you have for male youth workers as they minister to girls?

Ginny: Male youth pastors need to be aware of their emotional boundaries. They need to make sure they are not depending on a young girl to give them emotional encouragement. They need to ask themselves, “Am I looking forward to this meeting with the student too much? Am I looking for her to meet inappropriate needs?” They need to have people hold them accountable. Make sure you are always meeting in a place with a door that has a window in it or in places where people constantly are around.

Crystal: Male youth workers need to be very aware of how easy it is for some girls to become emotionally attached to their leaders. A girl may fall in love with her male leader because he might be the first man who has paid attention to her, listened to her and cared about her.

Megan: Don’t be threatened by a girl’s strength. If you are, find out what that’s about for you. Pour belief and encouragement into a young girl’s life. Prayerfully consider how you currently are modeling female leadership within your ministry, and make sure your model is one of equality. Males and females are gifted and have incredible potential to be used by God.

YWJ: What role do you think athletics play in the lives of girls?

Ginny: Girls who are involved in athletics are less likely to be involved in risky behaviors because their energy is being funneled into something positive. Their confidence is being developed because they’re learning leadership skills and what it means to be part of a team. In youth ministries, be aware we usually have different ages and genders playing games together. Ask, “How do we do this to make sure no one feels embarrassed?” If students make a mistake in a game, help them understand it does not reflect their self-worth.

YWJ: What changes are coming to the world of girls?

Ginny: With the rise of technology, girls are able to access information earlier. It used to be they would go to college and learn about sexuality. Now that’s taking place in forth and fifth grade. Young girls are taking pictures of their bodies and sending them to guys on their cell phones and asking, “What do you think?” These girls are getting hit with the message that if you’re going to be popular, you need to promote the sexual side of your being, but they’re not sure how to handle the consequences. So many parents don’t want to believe their kids who are doing this stuff, so you have to convince them, “These are OUR kids. These are not some other kids elsewhere.” Help parents understand the importance of talking with their kids about these issues proactively.

Megan: There’s been an enormous shift in our culture. There used to be male heroes; now there are female heroes. That’s a great thing for girls to see. It gives them the message, “We can save the world. We can be role models.”

YWJ: Final thoughts?

Ginny: One of the major issues facing girls is this whole sexual identity issue and same gender attractions. The church has gotten stuck talking about this theologically. What we really need to be dealing with is, “How does this issue impact our kids, and how are we going to address this?” We’ve got to expand this conversation. It’s not helpful for a girl struggling with this to know that it’s sin. Instead, we need to talk with them about what God says about their identity and who they are.

Megan: Girls today need a heroine. They need someone to follow. Youth workers have the potential to be that heroine. It’s an awesome privilege and honor to wave the flag of belief for someone.