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Thou Shalt Care: The XI Commandments of Showing You Care...
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Thou Shalt Care: The XI Commandments of Showing You Care about Volunteers
By Danette Matty
member of Group's training team, volunteer youth leader, freelance writer & speaker, pastor's wife & mother

We all know friends, pets and even houseplants need care, but what about volunteers? Here, a veteran youth ministry worker provides a short list of ways you can express your care for your volunteers.

Commandment #1

Challenge me spiritually, not only as a leader. Rarely do my peers ask me about my spiritual life. I need a key leader in my life who will challenge me lovingly. Even if it’s not an accountability thing. Now and then, ask me (or have your spouse or another respected samegender leader ask me): What have you been doing in your God-time lately? How has God been speaking to you these days? Are you taking time away from noise to minister to God and allow Him to minister to you? (If I answer no, you should know what to tell me.) How can I encourage you in your walk with Jesus? How can I pray for you this coming week? Under your leadership I want my faith and intimacy with Jesus to grow. I’m responsible to make time for Him, and I’m helped if you encourage me.

Commandment #2

Give me permission to say no. Part of me would say “yes” to everything you ask because I’m loyal, and I enjoy being with students, but I’ll wear out emotionally and physically if this is all I do. When you ask me to be part of one more program, event, or trip, prefacing it with, “You’ve been here for a lot lately, so if you need to say no to this, it’s cool. But would you like to …?” Or, instead of saying, “I need you to …” as if it all hinges on me (I know those communication experts instruct you to say “I need you” in order to make people feel important; but it terrifies some of us because we’re exhausted!), try something affirming, like, “I’d be dumb not to ask you because you’re good at what this involves; but if you can’t, will you help me teach someone else what you know about …?”

Commandment #3

Encourage me to take my breaks before I “need” them. I don’t like throwing down the “nobody’s paying me” card, but sometimes I think you forget I either have a family, a full- or part-time job, other volunteer duties in this church or community, a sanity-saving hobby or a combination of all the above. I’ll be as committed as I can, but I need to know once every few months I can take a night off, that I don’t have to be at every event throughout the year. If I’ve been faithful, I don’t want to have to ask for a break. I want you to tell me to take off because you want me to be whole.

Commandment #4

Use me in my areas of giftedness, not yours. Ask me when you first recruit me what I’m good at and would like to do. I’ll probably be willing to do some things I don’t enjoy sometimes, but you’ll get a lot more mileage out of me when you find out and use what’s in my gift set. You can challenge my weaknesses. However, if I’m not thriving in my strengths, eventually I’ll get discouraged and won’t be the great volunteer you need me to be. Let me know you appreciate and value me as part of your hand-picked team (even if I’m not good at what you’re good at or I’m not your favorite).

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