Begin by paying attention to the clues they’re giving out. What does their clothing express about them? What situations make them uncomfortable? What topics cause them to clam up verbally and emotionally? You’ll be surprised what you can discern. Then start asking good questions one-on-one. If they’re falling into sexual sin, help them discover the emotional patterns that lead up to a fall and deal with the root issues (typically insecurity, loneliness, fear or boredom).
Address sexual addictions. If one of your students is facing significant sexual addiction (masturbation several times a day, anonymous sexual encounters, significant promiscuity), don’t hesitate to refer them to a good Christian counselor. Be sure to interview the counselor first to ensure their approach and perspective on sexual morality fit with your own—the “Christian” label may not mean what you think. A good counselor will be trained to quickly get to the root of the addiction and will involve you in the healing process.
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For students with same-sex attractions, Exodus International has a terrific network of ministers and counselors who can work alongside you to help them discover their God-given gender and unearth the roots of their struggle.
Sexuality is a key door into the hearts and lives of today’s youth, a pimped generation. Praise God that He has something beautiful in mind for them!
Resources for Helping Your Kids
Teen Sexuality and Intimacy
Real Sex: The Naked Truth About Chastity, Lauren Winner
Hurt: Inside the World of Today’s Teenagers, Chap Clark
Porn and Masturbation
Every Young Man’s [and Woman’s] Battle, Steve Arterburn
Sexual Abuse
Caring for Sexually Abused Children: A Handbook for Families and Churches, Timothy Kearney
Homosexuality
Truth & Tolerance: A Youth Leader's Guide to Homosexuality
(exodusbooks.org)
Helpful Web sites
Find out what teens are thinking: sexetc.org
(This content is not for the faint of heart.)
Abstinence resources: abstinence.net
Internet tips for parents: internetsafe.org
Scott Davis is the director of Student Ministry for Exodus International (exodus.to), an organization that offers compassion and healing to students who struggle with same-sex attractions. He is also a co-author of God’s Grace and the Homosexual Next Door.